It’s Okay To Ask For Help
Have you ever noticed that you will hold yourself accountable to someone else, but not to yourself?
Like - you’ll let your Wednesday morning gym sesh slide if you’re going alone, but when you’re meeting someone there you’re actually 2 minutes early?
Saaaaame!
And you know what - I used to get so frustrated and start the negative talk about being needy, being irresponsible, being lazy, and all those things I would NEVER in my life say to someone else.
Then I listened to a book (I know, surprise!) by Gretchen Rubin, Better Than Before.
In this book, she touches on the 4 tendencies. She has a full book on this that I just ordered
During the book, I learned that I identified as an Obliger. An example is “I do what I have to do. I don’t want to let others down, but I may let myself down.”
Learning this came during the time when I was doing a lot of inner work - finding out who I am, what makes me tick, why I succumb to self-sabotage in certain situations, etc.
As I started to do more coaching I realized I wasn’t the only one with this same tendency. I then started to think about all the coaches I’ve had and why I hired them.
Hiring a nutrition coach to help track my food while pregnant with Ellie because I’ve dealt with food/body issues so I knew I couldn’t trust myself
Hiring a life coach to work through a career change after Ellie was born because I knew I couldn’t handle 3 jobs and I needed someone to help guide me through the overwhelms of deciding what was best for me - not for everyone else.
Hiring a “numbers style” business coach while running The Hatchery’s physical space because I knew I wouldn’t sit down and go through the numbers like I needed to!
Hiring a social media coach to help with marketing our business the right way because tracking metrics, creating a plan, and creating the content would always get put to the bottom of the list and I brainstorm better with others than my dog.
Hiring a transitional coach when I was running The Hatchery’s physical space because I was on a steep downhill of burnout and no longer could “figure it out myself”. She also helped me remove blocks to where I could work through my numbers without getting a mild anxiety attack!
Rehiring said transitional coach when I closed down The Hatchery’s physical space and went through a miscarriage.
Hiring a brand strategist to help navigate the pivot from being a physical space to the world wide web because I would get stuck in the ‘how-to”.
The point is - you’re not needy, you’re not irresponsible, you’re not lazy. You’re human.
It’s okay to ask for help because things are hard and we shouldn’t have to do them by ourselves.
It’s okay to receive accountability. It’s hard to ask, but it’s magical when you can show up for yourself just as much as for others
This is why I’m passionate about coaching other people - because I’ve been there and can help see you through the sludgy parts of business owner life.
Also, do you know which of the tendencies you are?